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Hoyer Whoops Ass

After claiming he had the votes to win, John Murtha got his ass handed to him by the more moderate Hoyer who is a full century or more younger than the Pennsylvanian. In the end, old age and treachery lost to youth and charisma.

When asked for comment, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi said, “”I was proud to support (Murtha) for majority leader, because I thought that would be the best way to bring an end to the war in Iraq.”

While nobody within earshot of that nonsensical rambling could figure out how the two were related, Pelosi accepted the first humiliating defeat of her fledgling regime.

Having pledged the most ethical Congress in history, Pelosi and her cohorts set a sterling example for America’s youth and celebrated the loss of the #2 spot by exchanging hits off a crack pipe, selling their country to the highest bidder and stealing social security checks from little old ladies.

Written by Michael Turk