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Death To Erotic Thrillers

MoviesPoliticsSo Basic Instinct 2 crapped out at the theaters this weekend. It came in behind 9 other films, and three of those were Slither, She’s The Man, and The Shaggy Dog. It’s safe to say that Sharon Stone’s new flick is over before it began. This will be one of those jokes they tell about movies.

I wanted to see Basic Instinct 2, but I was sick that day.

Since nothing bad that happens to the left happens can go unblamed on others, the writers and directors are of course choosing to credit the GOP with their failure.

“Anything that is erotic has been banned in the United States,” said [Director Paul Verhoeven]. “Look at the people at the top (of the government). We are living under a government that is constantly hammering out Christian values. And Christianity and sex have never been good friends.”

Scribe Nicholas Meyer, who was an uncredited writer on 1987’s seminal sex-fueled cautionary tale “Fatal Attraction,” agrees, noting that the [erotic thriller] genre’s downfall coincides with the ascent of the conservative political movement.

“We’re in a big puritanical mode,” he said. “Now, it’s like the McCarthy era, except it’s not ‘Are you a communist?’ but ‘Have you ever put sex in a movie?'”

Or maybe you’re just making shitty movies and have run out of original ideas. Perhaps it’s not the fact that erotic thrillers are unwelcome, perhaps nobody wanted to see a sequel released 14 years after the original. Nobody’s exactly screaming for the next installment in the Weekend at Bernie’s franchise. That has nothing to do with Christian opposition to zombies, though.

[Author’s note: I hope I’m correct to assume that the god-zealots are still not in favor of the dead (save for their guy JC and Elvis) rising from the dead and walking around.]

Movie audiences will reward good movie making. Period. Make good movies, and people respond. Look at the number of small independent films that are flourishing. But if you make rehashed crap, and try to make it sell by using the same, over the hill, aged hag has-been actresses, you’ll end up in a dead tie with Larry the Cable Guy’s movie.

Written by Michael Turk